Life is incomplete without a maid and her drama on little things. In India after a girlfriend or wife only maid has number of nakhras that you have to bear silently. So, this sums up all the time that your maid acted like a complete pain in the ass!
After boss ka kich kich, wife ka kich kich, there comes your bai ka kich kich that usually is about trivial things and really tests your patience. She will go on and on about things like how her dear jadhu is giving up on her and constant harping for new supplies.
Yes, she has a new excuse everyday for a weekly holiday with either her alcoholic mard getting sick because of excessive drinking or her kids catching the seasonal flu. She might have a problem back at home or her mother-in-law that she hates and who is on her death bed just got a stroke.
The concept of Indians are never on time applies on your bai as well. She is her marzi ki malik and being on time is not for her at all. She will come according to her wishes and if you tell her there will start another endless rant and other batch of inconsolable tears.
Has your life turned to “koney ka doh lakh lungi”? Your bai has an acute abhorrence to the very corners and will skip it as if the very killer is going to jump on her from there.
Your bai takes plenty of time to come to your house but when she does she will try to complete all the work in an hour or two. In this process, if your utensils still have soap on it or your vegetables are overcooked mess she won't care.
Your maid also has the tendency to gossip about the whole mohalla to you. This is where you get the juiciest day to day real life saas bahu drama from. She will bitch about the people and it would be a real breach in employment contract if you don't listen to her ramblings.
This is usually what happens when two or three tress in your garden starts producing fruits. She'll turn into a Spiderman and climb those trees with all her back pain vanishing. She has some unknown contractual right on all the fruits and will sulk and crib if you don't let her take some.
Pagar poori legi but kaam adhoora karegi. If that has been the case with you, your maid needs to be booted as soon as possible. They usually don't give a damn about how they work but are more concerned with cleaning as soon as possible but during salary time will beg and fight within the inch of her life.
Remember the time when you are taking out your winter clothes and dumping the summer clothes. Your maid suddenly becomes the enthusiastic helper and starts for the first time in her life working with her whole heart. Don't be fooled, she's in for just the discarded clothes that she is hundred percent sure that you don't need.
She avenges all the atrocities and sharp words you said to her by making food that shrivels your innards. If she is angry she will make sure you feel her anger through the amount of mirchi and masala that she will put in the food. If this is not evil enough wait for the aadha kaccha, aadha pakka food that even your esophagus has a tough time performing peristalsis on.
Yes, she also has made a stake on every leftover and would know without checking what the leftovers that she can use are. She has eyes on every discarded stuff and will fight for it eventually. She will convince you that the stuff is better off with her than the kabaadi wala.
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